I was in South Kensington. When I left the tube station, I saw a busy upmarket fast food chain, a respectable coffee shop and a Lamborghini show room. South Kensington isn’t a part of London I know very well, or understand; I only tend to visit this part of the city to visit one of the three museums which are all situated next to each other. In fact, I tend to avoid South Kensington.
I was slightly excited about going to this Meetup. I first thought that the ‘law of attraction’ was going to be some kind of workshop that would help me (or anyone else, for that matter), to become irrepressibly charismatic. The description of the event, however, totally baffled me. There were references to teachings that were described as life-changing and transformational and I was willing to be transformed.
A short walk down the Brompton Road took me to the entrance to a cul-de-sac that was, in effect, a set of stratospherically expensive ‘mews’ cottages. As if to confirm my thoughts of how expensive the neighbourhood was I walked past a classic car show room that seemed to only sell Aston Martins and classic Ferraris. A minute more of ambling led me to the door of what looked to me like a yoga studio.
‘Hello. I’m here for the Law of Attraction… event’. I said to a mystical looking young man who sat at the reception area.
‘That’ll be ten pounds please’.
I gave him my hard earned money, and I was told that I should remove my shoes, even if I wanted to use the bathroom. I was a bit grumpy about this (knowing what gentlemen’s lavatories are generally like), but I thought it would be best to go along with whatever he suggested. When I returned I found a seat on a bench next to three women who were waiting to join the same event.
Ten minutes later we were gently ushered into a relatively small room which contained candles, cushions and a CD player. Trisha, our teacher, set out folding chairs in a rough circle and gave everyone a card (which we were allowed to read). My card had a painting of a round headed cartoon man who had his eyes closed.
When everyone was assembled, it was time to meditate. Trisha pressed play on her CD player, starting some gentle lilting electronic music, and ‘guided us through the practice’. I never know what to do during meditation, but Trisha encouraged us to either focus on our breathing, or to listen to the music. I briefly opened one eye and peered around the room. I saw Trisha looking at everyone, as if she was making sure that everyone was meditating correctly. I closed my eyes again and concentrated. I started to contemplate one fact, which was, ‘have I just paid ten pounds to meditate in a room filled with strangers?’
‘We’re now going to read our cards, and introduce ourselves’ Trisha spoke, after what seemed to be an inordinately long time. She turned to the woman on her left. She said her name, read her card and told everyone how she related to the card, and how it connected to her journey. I listened as everyone talked, but I didn’t understand anything that was being said. The only thing that I did learn was that there were four people who had come to the event through the Meetup advert.
It was my turn. I was worried. I had to hit a balance between giving sufficient detail to effectively disclose, whilst at the same time not saying too much to make everyone think I was crazy.
‘My name is Chris, and my card is about breathing’. I read out my card. The front of the card had the phrase ‘as I breathe deeply, I feel myself thrive’. I turned the card over and read what was written: ‘thriving is as natural as breathing itself; by relaxing often, and breathing deeply – your natural thriving is enhanced’.
‘I have to confess that I don’t know anything about the Law of Attraction; I’m totally new. I came here because this was the first event at eight o’clock on the meetup calendar’. I paused. I heard an intake of breath. I needed to say something else. ‘And my thoughts on the card…? Well, breathing. It’s important, isn’t it? We need to do it to thrive. I think it’s very sound advice’.
After the introductions were complete, Trisha handed out an activity form. It had the title ‘The Appreciation Process’. We had to write down fifty different things that we appreciate. Surprisingly, I didn’t find it too difficult. I discovered I appreciated Manchester, orange juice and pasta, along with WiFi, trousers and instant coffee. Having completed the fifty, Abi, the woman who was sitting on my left, turned over her form and started to write even more. Maybe she was trying to get to one hundred.
Thankfully, we didn’t share our appreciations. Instead, the group talked about how ‘the law of attraction was helping them’. Abi told us a story about how she was into music, and thought of an old friend from her school days. Apparently she bumped into him a couple of weeks ago and discovered that he now worked in a record company! Everyone erupted; there was agreement that this was ‘the law of attraction’ working. This was something that was called ‘a manifest’; a positive thought that led to something real. You think something and you ‘manifest’ your dreams.
One of the two other men in the group started to speak. ‘Talking of music, I’ve always liked musician Paul Weller, and one day Paul Weller walked into the gym where I was working. It’s such a coincidence!’ This was followed with a short story of how he moved from the countryside to London, where unexpected things were happening to him because ‘he was that kind of guy that things happened to’.
Another story was from a woman called Helen who was sitting a couple of seats away. Helen was in her mid-twenties, had long auburn hair and wore no nonsense red lipstick. ‘Me and my boyfriend decided to move in together and we needed to find a flat in London, but I told him, ‘it’ll be okay, the law of attraction will help us; we’ve just got to keep thinking those positive thoughts, and everything will be okay’. Of course my boyfriend thinks that the law of attraction doesn’t make sense, and I’m crazy, but I just tell him, ‘wait and see!’ And, then, what happened, was that we found a really great flat that was less than the going market rate!’ Everyone in the room gasped. ‘The woman who was renting out the flat was going abroad at short notice, and she wanted to find some tenants quickly’.
There were two more stories before it was time to move onto ‘the universe list’ activity. The form that we were given had two columns: things that I will do today, and things I would like the universe to do.
I asked a practical question: ‘has it got to be today, or can it be tomorrow? The reason that I ask is that there isn’t much left of today…’ Trisha said that it was okay if we completed the form if we were thinking of ‘tomorrow’. Reassured, I wrote, ‘eat breakfast’ and ‘go to work’ in the left hand column. I also asked the universe to do my shopping, and bring me a beautiful intellectual even tempered girlfriend who wasn’t into wacky spiritual stuff.
By the time everyone had completed their universe list (which we could take away), our hour session was up. Before we made our way back to the reception area, I asked a question to another member: ‘I’ve heard people talking about ‘the secret’. What is that? Several people have mentioned it.’ The Secret, it seemed, was a documentary. If I was interested in all this stuff, I needed to watch it.
I made a note of something that Trisha said. She told us that ‘everything we desire already exists’. Apparently, all we’ve got to do is adjust our thought patterns to make our dreams become a reality. The essence of ‘the law’ seemed to be if you think positive things you’re going to attract positive things, and if you think negative stuff you’re going to attract negative stuff.
It was dark by the time I left the Yoga Studio, and I was glad to leave. I didn’t like the meditation and the soothing music, I didn’t like the candles, and I didn’t like the idea that people could magic their dreams into existence just by thinking about them.
What I did like was the idea that we should generally try to keep seeing the positive side in everything. Plus, I was sure that my beautiful intellectual non-spiritual girlfriend did exist somewhere. The trick is that I need to keep thinking about her, so she is magically given to me by the universe.
No comments:
Post a Comment